What is so hard about tipping?

So, a little background, I am a server, done.  Today I was at work and a lovely elderly couple came in and said they had a wonderful time, and as I looked at the finished bill it contained a single dollar, their bill came to almost forty dollars...  One thing that pisses servers off more than anything is people who compliment our service, then tip us less than 10%. Is it really that hard to dig deep down into your pockets and pull out 20%?  This is how it works, for those of the general public that is to F&^%ing retarded to figure this one out...:
1%: Absolutely horrid service.  No drinks were refilled, the only time you saw your server was to take your drink order, food order, bring out the food, and present the bill.  And the time between the order taken and the food presented was about an hour.  Basically minimal service was given, and time between each of these steps was retardedly long.
10%-15%: Basic service given.  Drinks are refilled, but are drained before the server notices, or at 25% full, food delivery did not take forever to come out, server said some things to the party, had a good time, but more on the lines of Denny's good.
20%+: Service was everything you wanted, making the stay enjoyable, drinks were refilled every time (or close to it) you took a sip, server held an actual conversation with you while you waited for your food, helped with directions for out of town people, other little things that made your stay great.
Ok, now that the break down is done, let us think about possible reasons why people are so cheap.
1.) You're just a cheap bastard.  These are the worst, if you know you are cheap, just stay home, plain and simple, we don't want you just as much as you don't want to shell out the money, go back home!
2.) You're old.  Listen, I know that back in the '20's and 30's you could get a hand full of candy for a penny and that when you tipped a dollar that server was set for the next month to two.  Guess what!?  It's not like that anymore!  I know, imagine that!  A dollar doesn't even buy you a candy bar anymore, and inflation has set in royally, just like the song that your kids listened to that you thought was the devil's work, Times Are a Changing!

3.) You can't afford it.  Listen, I know that we all like to have a good eat out, but if you can barely afford the tab, either don't go to "upper" restaurants, or just stay home.  I see this so many times, a young couple with a kid screaming their heads off, makes a H-U-G-E mess of what was set in front of them, bill comes to about 40 bucks and they leave 2 to 4 dollars.  This crap pisses me off so much!  Not only did I have to deal with your kid screaming the whole time you were hear, giving me one gigantic migraine, but now I have to clean the area they were in because all the food, plus some crap that I don't even think we serve here, had wound up on the floor, in the chair, and 2 miles down the road, bare minimum tip on ANY kid related party, 20%.
Now, I understand that when crappy service is given, a crappy tip is justified, but when a server is tipped crappy and wined and dined you thoroughly, there is a memory of you imprinted on their mind, and trust me, we don't forget, so the next time you come in trying to show off how great you are with that special someone, we are going to let you know what kind of service a 10% tip is to be expected, don't expect us to refill your drink, or care about you, but we will care about the little lady, throw in some flirting and wait, how did you get my phone number, who cares just call me babe!
Well I do believe that we have covered all bases, lemme know if I forgot one!  I will have to leave you with something special!